As a rising leader, there are a million "firsts", and it's your job to notice things you've never even seen before and navigate decisions when there isn't always a clear choice.
It can feel like a rollercoaster of ups and downs when self-doubt finds a home in the uncertainty, and sometimes you have to watch a team member go through it
too.
Fortunately, there is a reliable way to find confidence that works every time.
Let's demonstrate with a story.
You're on the spot.
The room is filled with team leads and key support staff from every department. Carly is seated in one of the extra chairs that was rolled in, and there's no room at the table.
She balances her laptop and notebook in her lap and leans over the arm of her chair to see Jeff's expression as he starts the meeting. He seems excited and a little hurried.
He wastes no time in announcing a new initiative, and to Carly's surprise, her team is going to manage it. A wave of excitement rolls over her, but it's quickly replaced by anxiety. Her old boss included her every step of the way, but now, she's the last to know.
I can't believe I didn't say anything!
Carly's mind swirls with endless questions. She needs to sort through it all, so she can address her concerns without making Jeff think she can't handle the project.
But before she can get her thoughts in order, Jeff asks for her opinion, "...Um. I...uh, I don't have anything to add. Sounds great."
Her heart races as she scolds herself, "What are you thinking?! Why don't you say something? You have ideas. Speak up!!!"
She builds up courage to raise her hand and say more, but it's too late. The meeting ends, and just like that, she misses the opportunity.
Why does she hesitate?
As a rising leader, clarity and confidence are often inextricably linked to the situation and environment around you. When things around you change, your confidence changes too.
During Carly's early career successes, she is encouraged and supported to contribute her best, so she does.
Now, her new boss doesn't offer the same type of encouragement, and she no longer trusts herself. She is afraid to make a mistake, so she stays quiet.
As a result, Jeff wonders if she is ready for the new opportunity he just gave her.
The real issue.
Carly doesn't have a deep enough understanding of the value she brings to her work and team.
Her confidence depends on the verbal and non-verbal support she receives. She looks for external cues—which are based on her perception of whether others (especially her boss) think her contribution is valuable.
What a shaky and unstable foundation this is!
Knowing the value of your contribution.
When you understand the unique lens you bring to everything you do and the direct and specific ways your uniqueness benefits your work and team, you can confidently contribute your best no matter what is happening around you.
Carly's Story Take 2: a different outcome.
Let's replay the meeting where Carly doesn't speak up and demonstrate how the entire experience can be different.
Carly listens intently to the strategy Jeff presents.
Her unique lens makes it impossible for her to ignore how this work can be accomplished. She is keenly aware of the process and plan right from the start, and the new strategy is missing a few important steps.
Carly knows Jeff is a strategic, high-level thinker who likes to operate at a 30,000-foot-view. She knows the success of this strategy depends on her ability to manage the details he cannot.
A thousand questions spin through her mind, but she disciplines herself not to make them all important right now.
She takes a deep breath, asks a few clarifying questions, and embraces her unique lens with total confidence.
"I see a lot of benefit to this initiative, and I'm excited about it. Thank you for assigning my team to manage it. My role is to translate this strategy into a plan we can execute successfully, and I see two potential challenges I want to make you aware of. If we can address these before we begin, I am confident we can be successful in this work. Can we schedule a separate conversation to go through them?"
Alignment generates energy.
Jeff thanks her for her comments and agrees to another conversation. Carly is full of energy and excitement and can't wait to share the new possibilities with her team.
A few minutes later, Jeff calls her, "Thank you for the thoughtful way you raised your concerns. Your experience and skill in process and planning is so essential, and I'm grateful you were confident speaking up." (Yes, I know not every leader will remember to acknowledge a rising leader in this way, but let's move on with the story anyway.)
The boost in energy and confidence Carly feels comes from being aligned.
Jeff knows Carly has aligned herself to the priorities he presented, and it gives him confidence that she understands what it takes to manage this project well.
Carly knows that Jeff is aligned with the way she is approaching the work, and she trusts he will listen to her and rely on her experience.
How to find confidence.
Because Carly does the work to understand the unique lens she brings to everything she does, she is confident in the value she brings. Visions aren't realized in the clouds, and she knows for certain her ground-level vantage point is essential.
She values her skill to translate a strategy into a step-by-step process.
She embraces her ability to connect dots and remember relevant details others forget.
She recognizes it's a very good thing to care about how work will be accomplished.
She knows from experience that when she addresses her concerns in the beginning, the project is always more successful.
And you can do the work to understand yourself this well, too!
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